What is my dream?
Lately I have been really pondering this question: What is my dream?
I have lived my whole life chasing a dream, but what really is it; and how do I know when I have achieved that dream?
I am currently typing this story at a quaint coffee shop on a small island in Thailand, called Koh Phangan. I just ordered a matcha, and my heart is really happy. If I was going to end the story now, I would say that is my dream. I do believe that I am living the beginning of my dream. I can see the future ahead, and I feel that what I truly want is in reach. The more I think about it, the more I realize that this is what I have always wanted. I just have never known how to put it into words, but I realize now that there is no way to explain because it is within the experience.
I have been battled with this question all of my life. I have never known exactly what I wanted to be in this life time. I have argued that I know I would excel at many different things, but I have not been able to pin point exactly what I want that to be. But who is to say we have to be one thing? In my short 23 years of life, I have worn many different pants, and I have found joy in many opposing hobbies from volleyball to modeling to yoga. I studied science in university, and I worked very hard to graduate with something that I found little joy in. I was motivated by the money aspect of this field, and I was doing it because I knew that I would have a secure, promised job at the end. Once I started traveling, I quickly veered off this path because I realized that there was so much more to life than having my face in a textbook 24/7.
Now that I am traveling solo, and I realize that this is what I want in my life; there is still a feeling of incompleteness. This is because I compare success and my dream with money. I feel that if I am living, but I am not making money, than I am not being successful in societal standards. This is confusing to someone who is finding joy in the little things, being especially present, and learning about the world. It is alright, and I understand that this is apart of the process. I understand that in time I will find ‘success’ from what I am passionate about, but the waiting time in between is interesting.
I came across a question awhile back that really stuck with me. It stated: if money was not a factor, and you could do anything in this lifetime, what would it be? This is also interesting. I asked my mom the question, and she said, “I would want to be Chip & Joanna Gaines, and I could rebuild and design houses with my husband”. This is a great conversation starter, and I believe that it will teach you alot about a person that you wouldn’t get from asking them their current career. This way you are able to understand what they’re truly passionate about. I do not know the statistics, but I have a feeling ~80% of the world would have a different answer to what they’re actually doing with their lives. I want to be apart of the 20%, who is doing what they really want to do. At the time, I was in a modeling obsession, and my answer was to walk the runway in Milan, Paris, Miami, and London at fashion week. I now recognize that I have a different dream, and I think it is ok and important to recognize when you want something to change within your life.
If someone was sitting across the table from me right now, and I was riddled with this question I would answer as follows. My dream is to be able to work from anywhere in the world. My dream is to be able to make money by helping other people on the internet. I am not sure if that is through social media, writing, yoga videos, or wellness coaching. I want to do this, so I can travel, explore, and discover each edge of this earth. My dream is to continue being able to sip matcha in a coffee shop on the opposite side of the world. I see this dream being possible, and I am manifesting and working towards it each day. There is just no one way to do it, so I know that it is going to take time to achieve exactly where and what I want to be.
The most important part for me has always been recognizing that I am becoming. Becoming is a special word for me, and I was first introduced to the idea when I was 18-years old & in my first yoga class. I was instructed that we are all on a journey of becoming, and I took it into my own understanding as a way of growing. I know that through all of my life experinces I am becoming this version of myself that I am very proud of. I strongly believe that everything happens for a reason, and I think this idea of becoming is inspiring because it is a reminder that you are constantly changing. The caterpillar doesn’t remain a caterpillar forever.
As I am figuring out how I am going to live out my dream, I am getting to have so many amazing experiences. This journey is interesting, and I never know what is going to happen next. Right now I am extremely grateful to have no restraints in my life, and I am able to freely travel around southeast Asia for the next couple of months. I am able to travel wherever I want, whenever I want, and this is part of my dream. I am inspired by each person that I meet along the way that is on a similar path, and I know that we were all meant to be doing this because it takes a certain type of person to pack their life in a 40L bag and take off. I never knew I was that person, but I had to experience certain obstacles in life to realize that this is what I am meant to be doing.
I challenge you to journal about your dream. Ask yourself and your frends, what would you be doing if money wasn’t an object, and try to compare it to what you are really doing with your life. If you are apart of that 20%, I applaud you, and I look up to you! If you are not, how can you alter your lifestyle now to look more like your dream life? Small additions of new hobbies, or things that warm your heart, is a perfect step towards your dream!
